Gary Taylor, John Jowett, Terri Bourus, and Gabriel Egan (eds), The New Oxford Shakespeare: Modern Critical Edition
pg 165Sc. 13
Editor’s NoteHere enter Dick Reede and a SailorEditor’s Note1
sailor Faith, Dick Reede, it is to little end.
2His conscience is too liberal and he too niggardly
3To part from anything may do thee good.4
reede He is coming from Shorlan as I understand.
5Here I'll intercept him, for at his house
Editor’s Note6He never will vouchsafe to speak with me.
7If prayers and fair entreaties will not serve
Editor’s Note8Or make no batt'ry in his flinty breast,Here enter Franklin, Arden, and Michael
Editor’s Note9I'll curse the carl and see what that will do.
10See where he comes to further my intent.—
11Master Arden, I am now bound to the sea.
12My coming to you was about the plot of ground
13Which wrongfully you detain from me.
14Although the rent of it be very small,
15Yet will it help my wife and childëren,
16Which here I leave in Faversham, God knows,
17Needy and bare. For Christ's sake, let them have it.18
arden Franklin, hearest thou this fellow speak?
19That which he craves I dearly bought of him,
20Although the rent of it was ever mine.[To Reede]
21Sirrah, you that ask these questïons,
Editor’s Note22If with thy clamorous impeaching tongue
23Thou rail on me, as I have heard thou dost,
Editor’s Note24I'll lay thee up so close a twelvemonth's day
25As thou shalt neither see the sun nor moon.
26Look to it, for, as surely as I live,
Editor’s Note27I'll banish pity if thou use me thus.28
reede What, wilt thou do me wrong and threat me too?
Editor’s Note29Nay, then, I'll tempt thee, Arden: do thy worst.
Editor’s Note30God, I beseech thee, show some miracle
31On thee or thine in plaguing thee for this.
32That plot of ground which thou detains from me—
33I speak it in an agony of spirit—
34Be ruinous and fatal unto thee!
35Either there be butchered by thy dearest friends,
36Or else be brought for men to wonder at,
Editor’s Note37Or thou or thine miscarry in that place,
38Or there run mad and end thy cursèd days.Editor’s Note39
franklin Fie, bitter knave, bridle thine envious tongue;
Editor’s Note40For curses are like arrows shot upright,
41Which, falling down, light on the shooter's head.42
reede Light where they will! Were I upon the sea,
43As oft I have in many a bitter storm,
pg 166Editor’s Note44And saw a dreadful southern flaw at hand,
Editor’s Note45The pilot quaking at the doubtful storm,
46And all the sailors praying on their knees,
47Even in that fearful time would I fall down
48And ask of God: 'whate'er betide of me,
Editor’s Note49Vengeance on Arden, or some misevent
50To show the world what wrong the carl hath done.'
51This charge I'll leave with my distressful wife;
52My children shall be taught such prayers as these.
53And thus I go, but leave my curse with thee.Exeunt Reede and SailorEditor’s Note54
arden It is the railingest knave in Christendom,
55And oftentimes the villain will be mad.
56It greatly matters not what he says,
57But I assure you I ne'er did him wrong.Editor’s Note58
franklin I think so, Master Arden.59
arden Now that our horses are gone home before,
60My wife may haply meet me on the way;
Editor’s Note61For God knows she is grown passing kind of late
Editor’s Note62And greatly changèd from the old humour
Editor’s Note63Of her wonted frowardness,
64And seeks by fair means to redeem old faults.65
franklin Happy the change that alters for the best!
66But see in any case you make no speech
Editor’s Note67Of the cheer we had at my Lord Cheyne's
68Although most bounteous and liberal,
69For that will make her think herself more wronged
70In that we did not carry her along;
71For sure she grieved that she was left behind.Editor’s Note72
arden Come, Franklin, let us strain to mend our pace
73And take her unawares playing the cook;Editor’s NoteHere enter Alice and Mosby [arm in arm]
74For I believe she'll strive to mend our cheer.75
franklin Why, there's no better creatures in the world
76Than women are—when they are in good humours.77
arden Who is that? Mosby? What, so familiar?
Editor’s Note78Injurious strumpet and thou ribald knave,
79Untwine those arms.80
alice Ay, with a sugared kiss let them untwine.[Then she kisses Mosby]Editor’s Note81
arden Ah, Mosby! Perjured beast! Bear this and all!Editor’s Note82
mosby And yet no hornèd beast: the horns are thine.83
franklin O monstrous! Nay, then, 'tis time to draw.[Then Arden and Franklin draw their swords]84
alice Help! Help! They murder my husband.Here enter Will and Shakebagpg 167 Editor’s Note85
shakebag 'Swounds, who injures Master Mosby?[Then they fight, and Shakebag and Mosby are hurt]
86Help, Will! I am hurt.87
mosby I may thank you, Mistress Arden, for this wound.Exeunt Mosby, Will, and Shakebag88
alice Ah, Arden, what folly blinded thee?
Editor’s Note89Ah, jealous harebrain man, what hast thou done?
90When we, to welcome thee, intended sport,
91Came lovingly to meet thee on thy way,
92Thou drew'st thy sword, enraged with jealousy,
93And hurt thy friend whose thoughts were free from harm,
94All for a worthless kiss and joining arms,
95Both done but merrily to try thy patience—
96And me unhappy that devised the jest,
97Which, though begun in sport, yet ends in blood.98
franklin Marry, God defend me from such a jest!99
alice Couldst thou not see us friendly smile on thee
100When we joined arms and when I kissed his cheek?
101Hast thou not lately found me overkind?
102Didst thou not hear me cry they murder thee?
103Called I not help to set my husband free?
Editor’s Note104No, ears and all were witched. Ah me accursed,
Editor’s Note105To link in liking with a frantic man!
106Henceforth I'll be thy slave, no more thy wife;
107For with that name I never shall content thee.
108If I be merry, thou straightways thinks me light;
Editor’s Note109If sad, thou say'st the sullens trouble me;
Editor’s Note110If well attired, thou thinks I will be gadding;
Editor’s Note111If homely, I seem sluttish in thine eye.
Editor’s Note112Thus am I still, and shall be while I die,
Editor’s Note113Poor wench abused by thy misgovernment.114
arden But is it for truth that neither thou nor he
115Intendedst malice in your misdemeanour?116
alice The heavens can witness of our harmless thoughts.117
arden Then pardon me, sweet Alice, and forgive this fault.
118Forget but this and never see the like.
119Impose me penance, and I will perform it;
120For in thy discontent I find a death,
121A death tormenting more than death itself.122
alice Nay, hadst thou loved me as thou dost pretend,
123Thou wouldst have marked the speeches of thy friend,
124Who going wounded from the place, he said
125His skin was pierced only through my device.
126And if sad sorrow taint thee for this fault,
Editor’s Note127Thou wouldst have followed him, and seen him dressed,
Editor’s Note128And cried him mercy whom thou hast misdone;
129Ne'er shall my heart be eased till this be done.pg 168 130
arden Content thee, sweet Alice, thou shalt have thy will,
131Whate'er it be. For that I injured thee
Editor’s Note132And wronged my friend, shame scourgeth my offence.
133Come thou thyself, and go along with me,
134And be a mediator 'twixt us two.Editor’s Note135
franklin Why, Master Arden, know you what you do?
136Will you follow him that hath dishonoured you?137
alice Why, canst thou prove I have been disloyal?138
franklin Why, Mosby taunts your husband with the horn.139
alice Ay, after he had rèviled him
140By the injurious name of 'perjured beast'.
141He knew no wrong could spite a jealous man
142More than the hateful naming of the horn.143
franklin Suppose 'tis true, yet is it dangerous
144To follow him whom he hath lately hurt.Editor’s Note145
alice A fault confessed is more than half amends,
146But men of such ill spirit as yourself
Editor’s Note147Work crosses and debates 'twixt man and wife.148
arden I pray thee, gentle Franklin, hold thy peace;
149I know my wife counsels me for the best.
150I'll seek out Mosby where his wound is dressed,
Editor’s Note151And salve his hapless quarrel if I may.Editor’s NoteExeunt Arden and Alice